The Galaxy S8 review you’ve been waiting for: Ringtones

CNET | 6/9/2017 | Patrick Holland
idkwatitis (Posted by) Level 3
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Samsung's Galaxy S8 is one of the best phones ever made, and it took a lot of scrutiny on our part to determine that. In addition to our general review, we tested its camera against the iPhone 7 Plus and we dropped it on the sidewalk in a durability test. But now, I wrote the review you've been waiting for: the Galaxy S8's ringtones.

A ringtone's true meaning can only be gleaned by listening to it over and over.

Testing - Things - First - Majority - Ringtones

But when my testing was done, a couple things became clear. First, a majority of the ringtones have a decidedly '80s vibe. Next, a ringtone has never won a Grammy. Perhaps one of these repetitive masterpieces can change that.

This jaunty collection of rhythms feel like the menu music in a Sega game. "Aqua's" repetitive soft rock keyboard vibe lets everyone know that you don't let life slow you down -- at any cost.

Tones - Movie - Theater - Someone - Phone

As one of the more annoying tones, expect to hear this at a movie theater when someone forgets to silence their phone. The manic "beep-beep-beeping" raises such questions as: Whose phone is that? Why do they keep letting it ring? Will this call ever go to voicemail?

It sounds like Samsung just recorded a heart monitor.

Sequel - Ringtone - Beep - Once - Beep

This is the sequel to the ringtone "Beep Once." And though it's faster and has double the beep budget, it's still not as good as the original. Much like "Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde."

The dazzling arpeggio lets everyone know that life is nothing but a repetitive farce. The ascending and descending melody never seems to stop. Also, I'm making the rule that only actual bellboys, Tim Roth and Jerry Lewis can use this ringtone.

Head - Crossroads - Soul - Blues - Chords

Head on down to the crossroads and be prepared to trade in your eternal soul for these quiet blues chords that would...
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