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Perhaps I’m a party-pooper by nature and nurture. When I was a kid I heard the music from the ice cream truck then excitedly asked my father for a quarter.
“No,” he said, “they play that music when they’re out of ice cream.”
Risk - Killjoy - Team - USA - USA
Unless you never heard that one, it’s an old one. Otherwise, it’s mine. But the risk of being condemned as a killjoy makes me defensive. “Our” team won, didn’t it? That’s what counts! USA! USA!
It’s a relentless insult: TV demands intelligent viewers ignore what they see to believe only what they’re told. Seconds after the US team won the Women’s World Cup on Sunday, Fox’s lead analyst Aly Wagner, former US World Cupper, gushed this:
Way - Nation - Way - Gender - Something
“The way they’ve lifted a nation! The way they’ve lifted a gender! It’s something to behold! … They’ve done so much more and against all odds!” Was that for our ears or our pancakes?
Against all odds? The US was the overwhelming, odds-on favorite.
Gender - Women - World - Cup - Mike
They lifted a gender? It was the Women’s World Cup! Even Mike Francesa could accurately tout the winners would be a women’s team.
They lifted a nation? How so? Was Wagner unaware that this team invited scorn, turning off so many who would have normally and naturally fully supported it? Could Wagner have been unaware that “we” were represented by those wearing Team USA uniforms while performing acts of choreographed immodesty and mockery of opponents?
Wagner - Impression - Americans - Blind - Love
Or was Wagner under the impression Americans can’t distinguish right from wrong, and thus provided blind, drooling, unconditional love?
In Sunday’s 2-0 final over the Netherlands, let’s examine “our” goals.
Goal - Traffic - Rose - Lavelle - Arrival
The second goal was scored in traffic by Rose Lavelle, who next awaited the arrival of teammates for a group celebration — a classy, welcome scene given what we’d seen.
The first goal was the work of Alex Morgan, who drew a penalty...
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