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A walk a day keeps the diabetes at bay, so I spend an hour or two ambling the neighborhood most days. It just generally feels good and it’s been helping me drop pounds slowly too (down to about 263-265, which makes me happy).
Most of the time, when I walk, I make that my prayer time. Sometimes I say the Rosary, sometimes the Mercy Chaplet, and sometimes I will bring my handy dandy little Magnificat and say the morning prayers. Sometimes I just wander around and talk to God/think things over.
Weeks - Saturday - Prayer - Walks - Depression
So two weeks ago Saturday I took one of these prayer walks. I struggle with depression and the last two years have been the hardest of my life. I was feeling low last week. The malignant and intense hatred I have experienced from super-Catholics has been painful and my struggles with anger (generally the source of my depression) have made the attempt to focus on God and praise him hard. I have often felt as though the call and command to praise God was just pollyanna passive-aggression (especially when it comes from malignant Catholics who tell you to that your anger at them is sinful and a sign of divine rejection while they applaud kidnapping and disappearing children and put their shiny happy masks on to praise neo-Nazis or tell lies).
But I also know that the genuine tradition of the Church does, in fact, urge us to praise God and that “we do well always and everywhere to give you thanks and praise.” So I’ve felt conflicted.
Walk - Morning - Prayer - Magnificat - Psalm
Anyway, on this walk I was reading the morning prayer from the Magnificat and read Psalm 66:
and has not let our feet slip.
O - God
For you, O God, have tested us;
you have tried us as silver is tried.
You brought us into the net;
you laid affliction on our...
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