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Having counseled hundreds of people over four decades, I can’t escape the fact that people seldom genuinely want to grow.
I can’t tell you how many clients and parishioners have had the solution to their pain within reach, but instead chose to prevent the healing that was readily available.
People - Wholeness - Maturity - People - Divorce
When I began counseling people, I mistakenly assumed they would want to grow toward wholeness and maturity, but I have seen people repeatedly choose divorce over healing. I have seen them reject redemptive change in favor of a superficial alteration that will do nothing to deepen their growth into wholeness. They remain stuck.
Most people just want to get by.
Solution - Fails - Hurt - Losses - Life
They settle for a short-term, stop-gap solution that avoids healing and fails to address the deep hurt and losses of life. No matter what our natural response might be, I am convinced that we are created to grow even though much in our lives works against our growth.
Why is this fundamental aspect of life so often thwarted? Why are so few of us willing to do the necessary work to push through the barriers that impede the way to maturity?
Process - Wholeness - Discomfort
The process of growing into wholeness is messy and brings its own discomfort.
Deep in the psyche of the first-world perspective, it seems that our built-in urge to grow is stalled by the more immediate desire to be comfortable, to be safe, to be sure and certain. In other words, we want to be in control no matter what it costs us. And as we will see, it costs us dearly.
Pursuit - Comfort - Determines - Move - Wholeness
When the pursuit of comfort determines how we live, a move to grow toward wholeness will merely...
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